More from my friendship book about relating in the social space...
In the days before chat rooms, blogs and internet friendships, having a ‘pen-pal’ was the way you got to know people from other places.
In seventh grade, when I was learning French, I had a pen-pal from France, who was learning English. One of the very first things we did was exchange photographs of ourselves. Having a picture of each other in our heads was an important part of getting to know each other.
Imagine that you are one of those instant polaroid cameras. Every time you have a interaction in the social space, it is as if you are spitting out a snapshot of yourself to give to the person you’re talking to. Your small talk is the picture you give out of yourself.
From the pictures you give out, and the pictures that are given to you, you are able to decide if these are people you want to get to know better.
Do you have something in common with them? Do you have a similar sense of humour? Do you find them interesting? Is there a natural connection? Could you safely share more of yourself with them, and begin to talk about the things that are important to you?
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2 comments:
Boy - living with Brad must have been hard (and intense).
I have the opposite problem - I never talk about anything meaningful!! What's the answer there!
You'll have to wait for the next chapter!!
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